Tastin' Broccoli: Parenting Tip for a Picky Eater

Parents of Picky Eaters Unite!
Do you have a picky eater?  Does he or she give you a difficult time during mealtime?  Would you like to try a new strategy to get them to try out new foods?  Maybe this parenting tip will help you like it has helped our family!  Keep reading to see how it helped us, then click on the link below for a free download of my Try New Foods chart!

My Picky Eater 
Miracle Man has had a difficult time with trying new foods pretty much since we started him on solid foods as a baby. He definitely has tExTuRe issues, and won't even put things up to his mouth that he thinks will feel or taste strange to him.  Over time, the foods he is willing to eat ebbs and flows.  Recently, though, he was not willing to eat much at all...even foods that he used to like a lot!  What was a momma to do??

Well, I sought out the help of the nutritionist at our pediatrician's office and she gave me a few tips, one of which is to put him on a multi-vitamin that includes magnesium in it because a lack of magnesium in the diet can actually lead to a lack of hunger.  (Hmmmm...weight loss tip for me?!?!?!) She also suggested that we talk with him about the colors and textures of the foods we are introducing to him.  And, like any parent of a picky eater can attest to, she recommended that we don't force him to eat anything.  She said we should not make a big deal out of what he eats.  So...that strategy may work for other children, but it is one I have used off and on over the years, and it never seems to work very well with Miracle Man.

The nutritionist gave me many other ideas, as well.  And, while I have implemented some of them, I haven't been able to implement all of her suggestions. I did recently come up with an idea that I thought I would give a try, though.  It sort of goes against some of her advice, in that it focuses more on what Miracle Man is willing to eat.  But it is actually working!  With our current successes, I thought I might share it with you in case anyone else is looking to try something new with their own picky eater. 

Try New Foods Chart

In my last post, I wrote about how I have just started a ticket system to encourage the kids to help out more around the house. Well, in conjunction with that ticket system, I created a "Try New Foods" chart! I created it in Microsoft Publisher, printed it out on colored cardstock, and then laminated it. Every time the kids try any new food, they get a smiley face on the chart.  Since it is laminated, I use a dry erase marker to draw on the smiley faces, complete with mohawks for Chub-Chub, and long hair with bows for Little Miss. In addition to the smiley face, I also give them a ticket toward the rewards system we just established. On Sundays, I erase the chart to start with a blank chart each week.   I wasn't sure exactly how motivating this would be, especially for Miracle Man, but it turns out that it works!!!  For Miracle Man, it does not work every time, or even every day, but he and the other two kiddles have been trying new foods a lot!

Since we started this chart, Miracle Man has tried raw broccoli, turkey hot dogs, salad (really just lettuce with ranch, but who cares!?), and raw red peppers, just to name a few.  He even had the raw broccoli twice!  This is such a major, major accomplishment for him!!  As for Little Miss and Chub-Chub, well, they are so motivated by the tickets that they are trying several new things each day even.  I do give them a smiley face and a ticket for each new item.  Originally, I was planning on introducing new foods just once per day and allowing only one ticket per day, but since the children have showed so much interest in being able to earn more tickets just by trying new things, I've decided that the important thing is that they are tasting new foods and exploring their taste buds willingly.  And that, to me, is worth as many tickets as they can earn!!

If you or anyone you know is dealing with a picky eater, you know the struggle.  It is real. And maybe some of the more traditional approaches will suffice for you.  But if they're not working, and you're at your wit's end, go ahead and give this chart/ticket thing a try!  What do you have to lose?  And you never know!  It may just work for you, too!  Feel free to share this article.  Click the link below for a free PDF download of my Try New Foods Chart! :)

Thanks for indulging me,
Marathon Momma

Want a free download of my Try New Foods Chart? Click Here!

State Services for Miracle Man

For about the past year I have been working on getting Miracle Man services through our state. He already receives services through the local channels, and attends a special education preschool program. He goes there every day for about 4 1/2 hours. While he is there, he receives many different therapies daily and throughout each week. Those therapies are all geared towards helping him grow socially, cognitively, and physically.

At the state level, there are programs out there that can assist him in ways that are above and beyond the scope of the educational program. One of the ways our state helps families who have children with disabilities is a Medicaid Service Program. I am not sure how it works in other states, only how I am experiencing it in my state.

In any case, through the Medicaid Service Program, children with disabilities whose families are at a certain income level can receive the state services and programs.  If you do not meet income eligibility, however, there is another option in order to receive services for your child at the state level. This is called a Medicaid Waiver Program. To receive any kind of service through this avenue, you first have to apply for the Medicaid Waiver.

I started this process in the spring time of last year. It is quite a lengthy process, but once we get through it and can start receiving services, it will totally be worth it! So the first thing you need to do in my state is go through a "front door" program. When I did this, it was before they implemented new regulations. I got in just in the nick of time. From what I hear, it is quite cumbersome now. In any case, for me the "front door" program consisted of meeting with somebody from the Office for People with Developmental Disabilities (OPWDD). At the meeting, the gentleman that I spoke with gave me paperwork and outlined for me a basic idea of what the program can do. After that, I was sent on my merry way to start contacting agencies that provide Medicaid Services and get a Medicaid Service Coordinator.

The Medicaid Service Coordinator does 90% of the paperwork, with my assistance. Sometimes acquiring a Medicaid Service Coordinator is challenging, especially for the younger children. I called around to several agencies and asked to have a Medicaid Service Coordinator, but many of them didn't have any availability. At the agency that I'm with now, I was actually put on a waiting list initially.

Every time you contact an agency to acquire a Medicaid Service Coordinator, the intake person gathers information about your child to see if their agency can support your child and service her or him properly. So for each agency I called, it meant that I would be spending at least an hour on the phone talking with the intake person explaining Miracle Man's complete social and medical history. And at the agencies where I went a little bit further, I then had to repeat the entire same story with another person.  I spent quite a bit of time on the phone in the summer and then again in the fall. 

In the end, the agency we were waitlisted at was really the best fit our family.  Luckily, by the time I had done some of the legwork with the other agencies, our agency had an opening for us. And, for those of you in the "know", I never actually got as far as the start of the application with any of the other agencies.  It was just a lot of bureaucratic red tape.
 

So all of these things take time, and several months later, in the middle of the fall, I was assigned a Medicaid Service Coordinator who would help me get the Medicaid Waiver application completed and sent out to the state. I've been working with this lovely woman for the past several months. She fills out all of the paperwork, but we meet several times for several hours each time...going over history, medical needs, social needs, everything that has to do with our little guy. Then she goes back to her office and fills out all of the paperwork.  She then contacts me with changes that need to be made, or questions that she has. I believe that we are nearing the end of the application process, and then we will be sending it in and waiting to hear back from the state.

Once the application is approved, it will still take some time before we can start receiving some of the services that we are seeking to meet Miracle Man's needs. I can't wait until that happens! One of the things that we will receive is some respite. But, it is going to be several more months before all of that can take place. I will explain how respite works in another post.

For now, though, I am in pain, and completely exhausted, so it's off to bed for me. It was a long, very challenging day. Good night all!

Wishing you wonderful dreams,

Marathon Momma

Stickers for Dinner

It was a regular old evening here in our house tonight.  The kids were running around screaming and demanding snacks while I was making" dinner". Then Miracle Man came up to me, holding a big brown nugget of poop, at which point Chub-Chub saw the poop and decided he needed to use the potty...as in RIGHT NOW! In between the stirring of the would-be dinner of microwaved eggs, the potty assisting, butt wiping, diaper changing, and washing hands eight times, the phone was ringing. And of course it was a call I had to take. 

When the phone call was finished, the boys' bowels were empty, the diapers were back on, and the hands were cleaned of any fecal matter (eeeewwwww...gross!!), we finally sat down to eat.  Chub-Chub began gobbling up his portion right away, hungry and happy to be eating.  Little Miss decided she didn't want to.even.try.the.gross.eggs.  (To which I politely  responded that she will eat them now or go to bed hungry).  And Miracle Man nibbled one bite, lost complete interest, and began throwing the eggs on the floor.  Yeah, I'd say pretty much a typical evening.

Sitting next to Miracle Man, I attempted the usual spoon-feeding, which of course didn't work.  He was having absolutely no part in eating those eggs, refusing to even open his mouth.  I tried something new, though.  I said to all three kids (of course it was mostly directed at Little Miss and Miracle Man---although I knew he wouldn't "get it", so essentially it was a challenge to Little Miss), "Whoever eats their eggs first gets a prize!"

Well, Little Miss embraced the challenge and practically sucked the eggs up like a vacuum! (That's my favorite appliance, remember?)  As soon as her last morsel was devoured, she immediately requested her prize and I sent her to the prize drawer.  She returned to her seat with a page of stickers...something that instantly  caught the attention of Miracle Man, who looooovvveeesssss stickers!  And then it hit me...that epiphany that I needed right at that moment: 

"Miracle Man, would you like a sticker?"
"Yeah."
"Okay, if you eat your eggs, you can have a sticker!"
"Yeah."

I spooned the eggs into his mouth.  And the little stinker ATE them!!! I had to keep promising the sticker for each bite, but I was able to feed him quite a bit of what was on his plate!  It was a huge breakthrough!

It may be only a temporary solution.  But it may not be.  Either way, I will take it!  And if it does work over the long-haul, we will be stocking up on stickers!!!

Relieved at the moment,

Marathon Momma

Momma Bear and The Sensory Kid

Miracle Man has always had sensitivities and "quirks". For instance, the textures and temperatures of foods affect whether or not he will eat them.  He refuses to eat chunky or chewy foods, but likes softer textures.  So, I can get him to eat hummus and guacamole (I know, right?!?!), but I have a hard time getting him to eat avocados, beans, or apples.  He will eat smooth yogurt (even plain greek), but if it has real fruit in it, he won't even let it get past his lips.  If one smidgen of chunky food gets in his mouth, he spits it.  Right. Back. Out.

When he was much younger, I could not vacuum the living room or turn on any appliance that sounded anywhere near  as loud as a vacuum.  If I did, he would start shrieking and screaming his head off. It scared him to death! So I used to vacuum around his sleeping schedule. Luckily, most of the time...if he was sound  asleep...he would continue snoring away and I  would be able to get the crumbs and dog hair off the floor.

It could get tricky, though, on days when I needed to vacuum several times throughout the day...instead of only  during naptime. You see, we had this rug that seemed to magnetically or cosmically attract every.single.speck  of dust in the entire  house, plus the neighbor's house. Tragically, it used to need to be vacuumed sometimes up to three times a day! With Miracle Man's sensitivities, if I needed to vacuum while he was awake, I felt like I was      tOrTuRiNg      him.  He would scream and cry hysterically, and it was extremely difficult to soothe him. Typically, when he was upset like that, he wouldn't calm down for at least an hour.  So, as a busy mom already strapped for time, sometimes I had to choose between keeping the rug clean of debris and the meltdowns that ensued, or letting go of the mess and keeping Miracle Man feeling "safe".

As the vacuum-phobia-screaming thing continued, it also escalated.  There came a point that whenever Miracle Man even saw  the scary-loud-sucking-up-apparatus, he would fffrrrreeeeeaaaaakkkkkk out...before I even turned it on!! We needed to find a solution so that I could vacuum with Miracle Man around.

So, with the help of his therapists, we tried to desensitize him to the sights and sounds of this machine that I , for one , am in complete awe of.  I must digress here for a moment because this is a topic that I think about all.the.time...I absolutely love vacuuming!  Well, not the actual lugging around, sweating, hard work part of it.  But, I am always fascinated by how AMAZING that invention is!  I mean, whoever came up with that thing is like my BFF for life!  I marvel at its awesomeness whenever I plug it in and begin sucking up dust, cheerios, powdered sugar, cat fur, cat puke, crazy loom bands.  Ooooo!  I love ,  and I mean LOVE vacuuming up those !  It gives me this twisted sense of satisfaction to just...zooooppp them up!  Gone!  No longer all over the floor!  Hehehehe!  (insert evil grin here)  You simply cannot deny that the vacuum is totally AWESOME! 

Anyway, back on topic...so to desensitize Miracle Man, we would have him in one room with the therapist and me in another room with the vacuum.  We would start by telling him that I was going to turn the vacuum on and then gradually bring him closer to me.  Each time a therapist was here, we would work on this, getting closer and closer to me, and then finally bringing him into the room where the vacuum was. In the beginning, we also would cover his ears when necessary. Over time, we would have successes, and then failures. But for the most part, the desensitizing worked. I was once  again  able to turn on my fav machine and go to town on those dust bunnies, dried up pieces of scrambled eggs, bits of pizza crust, Lego pieces (sacrilegious, I know), you name it!

We were so successful, in fact, that for quite a while now, Miracle Man has been able to handle the sounds of things like the vacuum or the blender like a champ, especially if I preset him (tell him ahead of time that I'm turning it on). I usually also preface it with a countdown of three so that he knows exactly when the noise will begin.  But our success was so profound, I could even vacuum right.next.to.him! 

Over the past month and a half, though, he is having a tougher time with his sensory processing. He is back to screaming and shrieking when the vacuum is on.  And it seems like every day, Miracle Man is having a harder time with noises. He has begun covering his ears for every loud sound he can hear, like the garbage truck going by while he is outside.  And while he is covering his ears, he is telling us, "Loud.  Loud.  Loud." 

Too, we just got a door alarm for the house because we're worried about the kiddles finally escaping to find a better set of parents. Naturally, whenever the alarm goes off, Miracle Man covers his ears and says, "Horn. Horn. Horn." It takes him several minutes after the "horn" is done before he stops covering his ears and he can move past the disturbance. His hearing (or his processing of what he hears) has gotten incredibly sensitive! 

On Father's Day weekend, we tried bringing the whole family to the fireworks.  Big Mistake.  Big. Although we had anticipated some  anxiety, we weren't completely prepared for his reaction.  He shrieked and screamed so badly that it was clear to us he was being Harmed.  We kept trying to move away from the blasts of beauty to find a better place to be; a place where he couldn't see the lights.  We ducked behind a tractor trailer next to the midway of the town fair we were at.  He continued to scream, and he looked...Terrified!  We covered his ears and moved still further back. Now, you should know that when Miracle Man has a seizure, his eyes get all funny-looking and his pupils dilate.  His eyes just look so...different . It makes him look like a different child. Well, at the fireworks that night, he started to get "that look" all over his eyes. We were very nervous, and he was so distraught, that we ended up heading to the car.

Safely inside the car, the booms and bangs were muffled, and the lights were hidden from view.  Miracle Man began to settle down a bit, but he was still fretting.  It was very scary to see him like that. And even though I had anticipated him having a hard time, I didn't expect him to freak out quite so badly.  My nerves were shot.  Momma Bear had had that fight or flight reflex.  It took a long time for the adrenaline coursing through my body to subside.  I have since decided that we need to get him a pair of those sound-deafening ear muffs.  We will probably also use sunglasses when there is so much visual stimuli in the future, as well.  But, man!  Times they are a changing for our family!

So, the next day, we were headed to a car show and Prince Charming wanted to wash our car before going there. We brought it into one of those automated car washes, and within seconds, Miracle Man was having the same expression on his face and that same shrieking-screaming-I'm-terrified reaction. It was so bad that I had to get out of my seat and climb into the back seat with him where I could cover his eyes and his ears to block all of the sensory stimulation. Again, he had that same "look" in his eyes that he gets during a seizure.  And again, there was a very worried momma.  Naturally, once we exited the car wash, he calmed down.  It took quite a bit longer than that for his momma to calm down~especially since it was the second day in a row! ;)

It seems these episodes are becoming more and more frequent.  For example, we recently went out to an old-time ice cream shop. There was a painfully long wait with the kiddles, and then it was finally our turn to be seated.  The waitress brought us over to our table and above our table was a fan. The way the fan was positioned, it broke up the light on the table that was coming from the lamp next to the fan. This setup created a strobe light effect and, once again, Miracle Man started to "freak out".  I thought he might have a seizure.  Luckily, I spoke with the couple who had been seated next to us at the same time.  I briefly explained the situation and they had no problem at all changing tables with us. We were very  grateful  to them!  We were able to sit and relax a while. And we definitely enjoyed our marvel-licious ice creams from the safety of our new booth!

Now, it's not just his hearing that has become super-sensitive.  So has his sight.  The lights in our house that didn't use to bother him at all, for instance, suddenly do. One morning we laid him down on the living room floor to change his diaper, and the light overhead was bugging him.  He was starting to get upset to the point where we had to turn off the light to complete the diaper exchange.  There have been several other "insignificant" moments where Miracle Man has reacted to lights lately. But none of them interesting enough to continue this paragraph. So this paragraph is done.  The End.  (I feel like a second grader. Lol)

I have always felt like I've been on hyper alert with Miracle Man. But lately, it seems like I have to be much more aware of sounds and lights and things that could upset him. That also means that bringing him to things like the movies is not likely to happen anytime in the near future. As I said earlier, I will probably be getting the noise-deafening ear muffs sometime soon, but in the meantime, I have to be very vigilant about what he is exposed to that might set him into a panic.  I am also anxiously awaiting a return phone call from his neurologist to see if he has any more input for us.  Until then, I am Momma Bear and I wait in the forest...watching from afar (but not too far), allowing him to navigate his world with some independence, but ready to attack those lights and sounds at a moment's notice!  RoAr! 

Yours from the Forest of Mommyhood,

Marathon Momma